Apparently, Plans Really Ignite Little Fires Over our Lives!

Hey everyone. dolst here. I know I said we would have the new site up by the end of March but the husband-and-wife team of Graveside Breakfast have been extremely busy. We hope you can forgive us having a bit of a delay getting the new site up since we have a whole slew of announcements here, so bear with us.
First off, we just finished recording our first full-length album, Born Every Minute! We’ve been keeping it under wraps because of some of the big names we’ve been collaborating with. The CD drops tomorrow, but we decided to announce it a day early because we just can’t keep it quiet any longer! Two of the tracks feature guest vocals from longtime friend of the band, Jesse Lacey of Brand New. Other guest vocals include Peter Murphy, Wiz Kalifa, and Kellen Quinn. And if that’s not enough, two of the songs were remixed by none other than Skrillex and will appear as bonus tracks, bringing the total to 14 tracks of blistering rock-your-face-off grimdark goodness.
And if you thought this was big, then hang onto your skullcaps, because we are about to unleash something even more terrible and/or awesome upon the world! Yesterday we confirmed that dExtrosien is pregnant… with twins, no less! As if things weren’t crazy and stressful enough! Yeah, the thought of me unleashing my demon spawn on the world is a terrible thing to contemplate, but I know dExtrosien will make a great mother. That is why I have mixed emotions about the divorce.
After two and a half years of a happy marriage and two babies on the way, it may seem counter-intuitive that we would want to split up. Fear not, though. Graveside Breakfast is staying together, much as the White Stripes did even after Jack and Meg White’s divorce. We have found that our musical synergy persists, even when the fighting in our personal lives escalates. When it finally came to physical blows, we realized it was not working out. We have begun the divorce proceedings, and we have agreed that we will continue to live together. Once the twins are born, I will have full custody of one, and she the other. We think this is for the best, since the twins should have both their parents in their lives.
I even get along with her new boyfriend, and she is on good terms with my new girlfriend. We are thankful we have such understanding partners who can help each of us through this new phase of our lives. We know this will come as quite a shock to many of you who have known us for years, so if you have any questions, we encourage you to read the first letter of each word in the title of this post, and things will become much clearer. Stay grimdark!